It's that loneliness again...

How is that I feel lonely when I have everything....

my family beside me,and many

more things that others can only dream of....?

Inspite of all this...

Why is it that my heart feels empty

and loneliness tugs at my heart and pain in inevitable...

It's the knawing pain that I haven't settled in life and i am a old relic,

no more marketable in the "marriage market" that hurts me more...

than anything.

No one has said anything to me that you are so old or why is

it that you are still unmarried...

But everyone does talk in hushed whispers....

That this girl is still unmarried,and something must be wrong with her,

maybe her horoscope is bad...etc etc...and that pains me a lot...

come on...I never chose my horoscope...I am not responsible for

what good planets or bad planets are born with...thats the play of the stars..

how can I set that right....

I don't even have supportive relatives who take any initiative to find a sutiable

match for me..they only know to talk and comment.....but no use..

It's easy for them to blame my parent's for the delay...

Ultimately the loser is me.....am still sitting at home....

But yes I am responsible for delaying my settlement..

I have made a lot of mistakes in life,not listening to dad's advice

except in ICICI case...

where I did listen and finally am somewhere because of

his guidance...and support...

But then my job isn't going to be my whole life...

I also desire a family

A loving husband...who can shower me with his time and love...

A child of my own...who I can love and nuture...

Wonder why god is denying me happiness in that side of life....

But then I can't take it..anymore..

I want someone to share my life with...and

God seems to show no remorse...to me...at all......

There seems to be no light at the end of the tunnel,

no silver lining...at the horizon.....

Am I destined to be alone...????????????